How to Support Someone Running a Marathon | 25 Ways!

Seventeen years ago, I decided to finally go for my goal of running a half marathon. I trained for months following Hal Higdon's program, purchased a SPIbelt and a few GU energy gels, and assumed I was good to go!

What I failed to plan for was how my husband would fit into the big day.

He had cheered me on as I increased my mileage and attended pre-race events. But neither of us had ever ran or even attended a race before, so we had no idea how to support someone running a marathon.

He dropped me off as close as he could to the starting line, leaving me to stretch and line up my playlist on my iPod Touch. (Hello, 2009!)

I wasn't sure where my husband went, possibly to park somewhere near the finish line so he could be there when I crossed it?! I didn't know what he should do and so...never told him.

But as the race started, I quickly realized just how many friends and family members stayed at the race. They lined the starting line with cheers, balloons, and homemade posters. What a great idea! I thought to myself.

But that wasn't all!

Those same supporters kept showing up throughout the race...the same people, the same matching shirts or wacky outfits, the same funny posters keeping me laughing every 2-3 miles. Walking, riding scooters, or pushing strollers, they were cutting across back streets, following the course map to another mile marker, then another.

I figured my husband wouldn't know to follow the course but assumed he'd be waiting at the finish line. I imagined how I would tear up when our eyes met, me just a few feet away from accomplishing a goal I had dreamed of for years.

But (insert trombone slide) it turned out, my husband also had no idea how race day usually went down.

He assumed the race was just for runners, parked at a nearby Walmart, and watched my progress on the marathon's tracking app. When it looked like I was nearly done, he drove back to the race and texted me from the car to tell me he couldn't find parking, but would keep circling the street until I could find him and jump in.

Crossing the finish line was still incredible; I felt relieved and elated and exhausted all at once. I still cried happy tears.

But I felt a teensy bit bummed that my husband wasn't there to witness my big moment. And my husband felt super duper bummed to learn how races actually worked and realize he could have done more to make it extra special.

Lucky for us, we learned and did things a lot differently the next big race. And lucky for you, I'm writing down exactly how to support someone running a marathon so that whether you're a runner or a supporter, you're able to rock the big day!

What Should You Ask Your Runner Before Race Day?

Ask your runner exactly what kind of support they want, because everyone is different.

Some people love a loud crowd of family at mile 20. Others want one quiet hug at the start and a ride home.

A few helpful questions to ask include:

• Where do you want me? Agree on two or three cheering spots and one meeting point after the finish.
• What should I carry? Gels? A spare shirt? Lip balm? A certain post-race snack?
• What should I say? Some runners want pace updates. Others (me!) just want to see your face and hear you cheering for them.
• What will you wear? Knowing your runner's shirt color will help you spot them in a pack of thousands.
• What's your goal pace? This will tell you roughly when they'll pass each spot.

Be sure to fit your questions to their experience.

Someone running for the first time faces different nerves than a runner with ten half marathons behind them. An ultra marathon runner may need you as a legitimate crew member, handing off food and socks at aid stations.

If you want to make your loved one feel especially supported, keep in mind how much work they've already put in. Months of early alarms, long runs, and a hundred small injuries will have taken a toll on their body by race day.

Training can also affect their mental health in both directions: it can lift their mood in a lot of ways, but can also bring on taper jitters in the final weeks. They might seem especially quiet or even cranky, and both are normal.

Rather than trying to give them a pep talk, try a genuine, "I'm so proud of how hard you trained!" That can make them feel seen without coming across as if you know exactly how they're feeling.

The night before and morning of race day, keep your texts and calls short. A long message is one more thing to process when you're trying to pin a bib and psyche yourself up at 5 AM.

How Can You Cheer Them on During the Race?

Cheer with a plan: stand on the right side of the course, use their name, and say things that help a tired body keep moving. Small choices make a big difference when your runner is deep into the race.

Where to stand. Pick spots past the halfway mark, where support is most welcome. Late miles like 18 to 23 are where many runners struggle, and a familiar face there feels huge. Stand on the side you agreed on so they know where to look. Avoid tight corners and water stations, where runners are dodging cups and each other.

Track them. Most big races offer a tracking app tied to the bib's timing chip. Use it to time your arrival and to know when to get your sign up.

What to say. Skip "you're almost there" unless the finish is in sight. At mile 20, six miles is not almost. A cheer coach writes that the right phrase at the right moment can change a runner's outlook for a mile or two. Try "You look strong" or "Smooth and steady." Shout names on bibs for strangers too, a tip echoed in this piece on personalizing cheers.

Big races need extra planning. At the London Marathon, crowds are dense and roads close early. Check transit closures, give yourself buffer time between spots, and accept that two good sightings beat four rushed ones.

What Helps at the Finish Line and Afterward?

Your most helpful job at the finish is getting your runner warm, fed, and sitting down soon. Finish line moments are emotional, and a hug and a snack top any speech.

Meet at a set spot. Finish areas are crowded and phones die. Pick a landmark away from the chute, like a lettered family reunion sign, and stick to it even if you lose signal.

Bring a small recovery kit:

• Warm layers and dry socks
• Water or a sports drink
• Salty snacks and something with carbs and protein
• Comfy shoes or slides

Keep them moving gently for a few minutes before they plop down. The Mayo Clinic Health System describes a three-phase recovery approach that starts with basic steps right after crossing the line, before the story-swapping begins.

Celebrate the effort, whatever the clock says. A missed goal, a walk break, or a stop at the medical tent still took months of work. Ask "How did it feel?" before "What was your time?"

Help in the days after. Stairs will be rough for a day or two. Offer to drive, handle dinner, and listen to the full mile-by-mile story. More than once.

Now you know how to support someone running a marathon! Whether you take one of these tips or all of them, it will mean the world to your loved one to know you support and believe in them!

Go you!